A Relationship Or A Contract??

Both insecurity and possessiveness are two different things by origin, but these two are enough to destroy any relationship i.e. a relationship which was created a week ago or a month or even a relationship which was created years ago. Insecurity and Possessiveness are the main reason behind the failure of any relationship. Let me first describe Insecurity and Possessiveness separately, then will explain how they are ruining the relationships.

INSECURITY:-

It is a state of mind where you self-doubt and ruins your life as well as people around you or lack of security. Here we will only be discussing insecurity in the relationships. The picture on the left side of your screen tells a lot about insecurity. Whenever you arise a feeling of insecurity, you begin to think or you begin to ask yourself WH question i.e. What if he/she is thinking bad about me, what if he/she is cheating on me, what if things go wrong, what if I failed, what if I didn't succeed, what if our relationship didn't succeed and there arise many more such WH questions in your mind. Due to these what if's, you start to self-doubt, feel lack of confidence, lack of self-confidence and begin to ruin your life and relationship.

POSSESSIVENESS:-

It is demanding someone's total attention and love. The picture on your left is clear for you to understand what possessive is. Being possessive means you are afraid, you are afraid of losing something or someone very close to you. The picture shows a boy and a girl are in a relationship, but one of them wants total attention and love from the other partner. They just want the partner should only text them, call them, talk to them, go on an outing with them and should give full attention every time. But this is something which is next to impossible because one or the other partner should give time to other people may be their college friends, office friends, family friends and many more. And as this seems to be impossible, the relationships begin to fail.

You must have got a picture of Insecurity and Possessiveness. Now let's see how they are the major factor for ruining a relationship. When someone is insecure, they start to doubt themselves as well as their partner. And as you are well aware that when there is a doubt in any relationship, it is not a long-lasting one. The insecurity that develops inside you begins to ask you the unnecessary WH questions which even don't exist. These WH questions make you overthink on a particular situation which is not having any existence. And you better know that overthinking and assumption kills, here your overthinking or doubt on a particular situation which is not having any existence kills your relationship. 

When someone is possessive, he/she believes that the other partner should give them their full attention and love. But just think once, is it possible to give full attention to one person only all the time? You are in a relationship boss not in any contract and Relationship is not a contract. Being possessive is okay fine, you are afraid of losing your loved ones, you care for them, but your over possessiveness might be the reason for them to leave you. They might see your care, adore you, but they don't want to live their whole life under your over possessiveness. Before loving someone, love yourself. In a relationship, if you feel jealous and possessive, the first thing you need to realize is that it's not about your partner it's about you. So it's your own insecurities that are driving your behaviors. 

These days relationships are more likely to be a contract rather than a connection. Relationships are judged on posts that one partner uploads. Love is just a secondary thing, Respect depends on the mood of the partner, Trust builds on sharing passwords, Forgiveness is just 11 letter word which was derived from a Latin word 'perdonare'😅🤣.

Carry a relationship with love trust respect and forgiveness instead of insecurities and possessiveness. Wish you all have a successful relationship ahead. Wish you won't let your insecurity and possessiveness ruin your relationship.